by Jennifer Blue | Jun 5, 2020
If your world is anything like mine, you’ve been spending a lot of time in Zoom meetings, phone meetings, and reaching out to friends and relatives via Facetime over the past few months. Instead of making a meaningful connection with the person on the other end, we sometimes leave one of these online encounters frustrated, empty, confused, and exhausted. Body language, tone, and expression can be hard to gauge and responses can sometimes be hard to navigate when we don’t share physical space. Developing effective listening and communication skills are more important than ever before.
Making a true connection with others requires us to take our mindfulness or meditation practices off of the cushion and into the world. We have to use those same skills that we practiced with ourselves and apply them in our communications and relationships with others. Your work might be teaching in a classroom, managing your own company, making products in a factory, or caring for people in a hospital and the skills learned through the mindfulness practice will apply. This is why I love the tips that our Founder and CEO, Annamarie Fernyak, put together for you. At Mind Body Align, we do our best to live out our mission and core values every day and we hold each other accountable to them. Our successes have been achieved by putting these tips to work and sharing mindful communication as a team- creating a safe space for us to live and work. As someone who continually strives to learn more and to communicate better with my team and my family, I hope you will find them just as valuable as I did and will put them to practice in your work and life.
– Jen Blue, Operations Director, Mind Body Align
Download the Mindful Communication infographic here.
Looking for more? Drop your email and we’ll keep you in the loop on all the ways mindfulness can help you navigate your workplace.
Jennifer Blue is the Operations Director for Mind Body Align having joined the team in August of 2017. She studied political science at Otterbein College and the University of Louisville. She returned to Mansfield in 2005 and is excited to be a part of the positive changes occuring in our community.
by Erin Schaefer | Apr 30, 2020
Introduction by Annamarie Fernyak
In the following blog post, Erin talks about the stigma of mental health and common biases toward people who may be suffering from mental illness. Before Erin’s thoughtful essay, I never considered that I might have biases. After reflecting on Erin’s words, I came to realize that some biases were just below the surface.
So, what can we do once you know those subconscious inclinations exist? What do I do?
Be mindful, of course! We each have the beautiful ability to tune the dial of awareness onto our thoughts, emotions, and bodily sensations. By paying careful attention, we gain information and uncover unwanted habits and beliefs. The pause taken to tune into awareness provides the opportunity for you to weigh what is happening at any moment against your values; then an action may be chosen. It allows purposeful actions instead of reactions.
Take time to self-reflect. Listen to your thoughts, emotions, and bodily sensations. Discover if you have habitual ways of thinking or hidden prejudices, and invite yourself to think, act, and exist in a way that positively serves yourself and the world.
Sending a virtual hug!!!
Mindfully,
Annamarie
“I heard you were sick the other day. How are you feeling?”
“You had surgery recently, right? How are you recovering?”
“Oh no, you have the flu?? Stay home and take care of yourself!”
All of the above statements are commonly heard among friends and co-workers on a daily basis. We are often able to discuss health issues and illnesses, checking on one another, and making sure physical health issues are addressed. Imagine if the following was overheard:
“I heard you had a manic episode last week. How are you feeling?”
“You had a psychiatric hospitalization recently, right? How are you doing?”
“Oh no, you had a panic attack? Please stay home and take care of yourself!”
If any of the above statements make you uncomfortable, you are not alone.
Except for those who work in the mental health field, the statements above do not roll off the tongue. We are completely comfortable talking about the health ailments of ourselves and our friends, family, and co-workers; however, the stigma around mental health often leaves us speechless and silent, rendering those with mental health symptoms isolated and ostracized.
So why does this occur?
There are a variety of reasons and theories. In the Middle Ages, those with mental health symptoms were thought to be punished by God or possessed by the devil, so they were often imprisoned, burned, or killed. Perhaps the discomfort around mental health stems from the colonial and industrial periods; at this time, women were commonly viewed as property of the fathers and husbands in their lives, and these men could have them “committed” to a sanitarium at any time, with very little evidence. In the days of Nazi Germany, horrible experiments were conducted on those deemed mentally ill because some believed the mentally ill were a disposable population.
In the 1960s and 1970s, deinstitutionalization resulted in the influx of those diagnosed as severely mentally ill as these individuals re-entered local communities to receive treatment. However, this also led to homelessness, and it doubled the number of people identified as mentally ill in the criminal justice system in the following years. Additionally, the media sensationalize acts of violence and attribute them to mental illness, even if there is no evidence of a connection.
In this historical context, all episodes of mental illness get lumped together. Whether the person is experiencing symptoms of schizophrenia, depression, or anxiety, the individual is often viewed from the same lens, both internally (view of self) and externally (how others view the person). If one grows up hearing about “crazy” people, who commit acts of violence or who live on the street, and then experiences mental health symptoms, it can be alarming and unsettling. Often, people will not admit to themselves or others what symptoms they experience for fear of being hospitalized, losing their job, or not being able to see or care for their children.
What can the average person do then, to reduce this stigma for oneself and significant others?
Mental health issues are isolating, and lack of connection with others exacerbates these issues. Human connection is the balm that heals. Sometimes, just having someone who is willing to sit with you, even in silence, is the most healing thing of all. Be that connection for someone. There are several things we can do :
1. Educate yourself.
The more you know, the less scary and strange something will be. And then, you can help educate others with facts.
2. Recognize what biases you have.
Examine from where these biases stem, whether from how you were brought up or societal influences.
3. Talk about your own mental health struggles.
Each of us has ups and downs in our moods and emotions; that is very normal. Each of us also has times in our lives when we struggle with difficult situations and circumstances. Talking about these struggles openly makes room and space for others to do so as well.
4. Be aware of language.
Instead of saying words like “crazy” or “nuts” or “cuckoo”, or even saying things like “he’s bipolar” or “she’s depressed”, say things like “he has symptoms of bipolar disorder” or “those who have schizophrenic symptoms”. This begins to identify the person as separate and distinct from the condition.
5. Support people who are struggling.
Reach out to someone you know is having difficulty with anxiety, depression, or even a psychotic episode. Let them know you are there.
*May is Mental Health Month and in support of our community, Mind Body Align is offering several FREE resources! Check it out here!
Erin Schaefer, LPCC-S, IMFT-S, is the Executive Vice President/Executive Director at Catalyst Life Services. She received a master’s in Marriage and Family Therapy from Pacific Lutheran University in 1997 and a master’s in Marriage and Family Therapy/Counseling in 2002 from the University of Akron. Erin has worked in community mental health for over 20 years. She was also director of Ashland Parenting Plus, a small nonprofit agency focused on teen pregnancy prevention, juvenile diversion, and parent education. She served on the board and as president of the Ohio Association for Marriage and Family Therapy and also on the board of directors of the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy from 2011-2013; she currently Treasurer-Elect, starting her term in Jan. 2020. She has been a member of AAMFT since 1997 and is a Clinical Fellow.
Erin has been married to Michael for over 20 years. They have two teenage children. Erin is also a certified running coach with Road Runner Clubs of America. She is an avid marathoner and loves running long distances. Erin believes in the power of exercise to help maintain good mental health!
by Amy Secrist | Feb 28, 2020
Q: I enjoy doing yoga but I get insecure about my body differences.
When I need help with modifications, I am embarrassed to ask. What can I do to let the instructor know that I need some assistance without disrupting the class?
Amy: I’m so glad to receive this question, and I really appreciate the phrase “body differences.”
There’s a lot to care for here, so I’m going to break up the answer into two parts. (look for Part Two to post soon!)
Part One: The Culture of Body Differences: Insecurity & Positivity
Because we live together in a society, we grow up learning what is and isn’t acceptable, as well as what is and isn’t desirable or worthy of attention, comfort, or praise from a variety of industries that make up our popular culture. From entertainment and leisure to fashion and trends, to scores of news outlets, we see, hear, and internalize sets of beliefs that shape our world view and self-image. In addition to these broader influences, our belief systems are also shaped by our specific family culture, which can include ethnic and religious traditions, shared knowledge, beliefs, and behaviors, as well as the outlook, attitudes, values, morals, goals, and customs shared by our own immediate and extended families. Because our cultural formation is both broad and specific, we grow into adulthood with a variety of filters unique to our own experience; and to add more complexity, these different lenses might even be in conflict with each other.
You are not alone. Our unique world view and self-image shape how we function in relation to ourselves and other people during public events and private moments. We tend to compare ourselves to an internal “ideal,” to other groups of people, and individuls to see where we fall on the spectrum of “socially acceptable.”
It’s helpful to remember that not only are we not alone in the experience of being different, but every single one of us has some kind of body difference, whether subtle or obvious, as well as invisible differences, such as auto-immune diseases, mental injury, complex learning styles, and so much more. So when we head into a body-based class like yoga, we’re all bringing with us thousands of years of ancestral DNA, our own cultural formation, and all of our “differences” both seen and unseen.
It is natural to experience insecurity around our differences. And it’s also natural to experience positive emotions around our differences. The next time you feel unsure about an instruction, posture, or practice in a yoga class, remember it’s not just you; most likely, other students are unsure about it, too. We’ll get into the details more in Part Two, but briefly, if the style of the class is not too terribly fast, and you can make eye contact with the teacher, trying asking for general suggestions. For instance, if you’d rather not ask specific questions about a particular topic, consider asking for more general modifications. Try something like, “Can you offer any other options if this isn’t working for us?” Remember this, if nothing else: Yoga, and yoga postures, are here in service to you; you are not in class to be of service to the postures.
If you’d like to take this discussion further, if you’ve ever thought, “yoga is not for me,” or if you’d like to explore the possibilities around shifting from insecurity to positivity, here are some great resources:
- Amber Karnes & Body Positive Yoga: Amber is the founder of BodyPositiveYoga.com and the creator of Body Positive Clubhouse, an online community for folks who want to make peace with their bodies and build unshakable confidence.
- Yoga for Amputees: Marsha T. Danzig
- Amputee Yoga Association
- Accessible Yoga: AccessibleYoga.org: A nonprofit organization that believes all people, regardless of ability or background, deserve equal access to the ancient teachings of yoga. By building a strong network and advocating for a diverse Yoga culture that is inclusive and welcoming, Accessible Yoga is sharing Yoga with all.
Part Two – The Yoga Classroom: Student-Teacher Relationship & Class Agreements (coming soon!)
Resident MBA Yogi, Amy Secrist, is available to answer questions, give insight and guidance, and help you feel great about your yoga practice. You can email your questions to Amy@mindbodyalign.com or message us on Facebook or Instagram #AskAYogi @MindBodyAlign
You can also join Amy for practice at the Butterfly House on Mondays and Wednesdays at 9:30 am. Learn more here.
Amy Secrist has been practicing yoga for 16 years and has studied under renowned teachers Tim Miller and David Swenson during her training at Yoga on High in Columbus, Ohio. Amy is steeped in the physically demanding discipline of Ashtanga Yoga as taught by Sri K. Pattabhi Jois, which focuses on cleansing and healing the body by linking one posture to the next through a strong and purposeful breath. While Ashtanga is the foundation of her practice, Amy explores and teaches gentle Hatha, Vinyasa Flow, workshop-style classes, and Yoga for kids.
Her approach to teaching is individualized as she addresses the needs of each student in the class. She encourages everyone to question, experiment, and take ownership of their yoga practice by deciding what works best for them. As a teacher, Amy is direct and easy-going, challenging and supportive, contemplative and practical.
Amy has also studied and practiced the art of reading and writing at The Ohio State University and The Bread Loaf School of English (at Middlebury College, Vermont). She holds a BA and MA in English with a focus in writing. She cites the two most influential classes during her studies as Critical Theory with JF Buckley and Poetry Workshop with Paul Muldoon.
by Jennifer Blue | Feb 28, 2020
Hello MBA Community,
This year at Mind Body Align we are embarking on an exploration into mindfulness and wholehearted living. We began the year by offering some tools for you to use in order to assess where you are at this moment. (see Annamarie’s wheel of wellbeing) Our intention is that each month we shed light on each area of whole living through our blog posts, podcasts, playlists, and even the resources that we curate for you in our retail shop. We kicked off the March topic with Coffee Talk guest host, Cindy Biggs. As an accomplished leadership and executive coach, we knew that she would be the ideal person to talk with us about this month’s topic, perfectionism. Be sure to keep an eye out for Cindy’s blog post called Perfectionism Rewired. It will be in your inbox next week.
So why are we talking about perfectionism if our year is focused on whole living? Why not just dive into one of the areas on the wheel of wellbeing? Sometimes we need to start with the obstacles. If we begin with them we can open up a dialog to find strategies and solutions. Perfectionism seems to keep coming up when we talk about issues facing our Mind Body Align community. The response to the LunchWISE Wednesday event last month, when we tackled the topic of Imposter Syndrome, truly struck a chord. I have never received so many emails after an event. The idea of being perfect can be a huge stumbling block when it comes to living a life that is fully engaged. For many, trying to be perfect is a way to avoid the fear of failure and, just to be clear, we are talking about perfectionism as opposed to setting standards or striving for excellence.
Back in October 2018 our guest blogger, Kym Lamb wrote, “I’ve found that Bravery Over Perfection comes when you are willing to inspect your strengths and weaknesses. It’s the willingness to question what you believe and why consistently…Bravery emerges when we embrace failure as taking that one daring step past fear and it’s when we recognize that excellence comes not in being flawless, but fearless.”
I love this! “Taking that ONE DARING STEP past the fear.
So how do we use and apply the practice of mindfulness when it comes to silencing our inner critic?
Begin with awareness.
Notice and pay attention to the words and tones that you use with yourself. The voice in our head can work to keep us safe but there are times when we need to simply recognize it and release it especially when it is telling us things that are negative or untrue. Would you speak to a friend the way that you speak to yourself?
Notice what is happening.
When we recognize that the voice in our head (our inner critic) is at work or we realize that we have set a standard that is beyond realistic, Mind Body Align founder, Annamarie Fernyak, says you should ask yourself the question, what’s happening now? What do I see, hear, taste, touch, and smell? What thoughts, physical sensations, and emotions are present? What do I “sense” or intuit is happening in the world around me?
Move into the present moment.
Once we have done a check-in with our heart, mind, and physical sensations we can begin to release judgments and embrace curiosity. Our thoughts pass by us like clouds in the sky. We observe them rolling past without becoming attached or engaging them.
Develop a practice.
Meditation is a great tool for learning to live mindfully. Like most things worth pursuing, it takes practice and training. Mediation can be done in the amount of time it takes to brush your teeth but it does require regularity. It’s a workout for your brain and the benefits of setting aside the time are so worth it. You would never expect to go running once and then sign up for a marathon expecting to complete it. Mindfulness meditation works in the same way. You’ve got to train the brain.
Find Support.
Surround yourself with people and things that support your commitment to living fully. It is essential to your success. Be aware of who you are spending time with, what you are reading, watching or listening to, and curate those things with intention.
As we move through the month of March and adjust our clocks internally and externally for Spring, our team at Mind Body Align invites you to join us with curiosity, self-compassion, and mindfulness as we explore perfectionism. We look forward to connecting with you at one of our classes, events or conversations on social media.
Sending you joy!
Jen
P.S. Be sure to keep an eye on your inbox for fresh new content to keep you inspired.
Jennifer Blue is the Operations Director for Mind Body Align having joined the team in August of 2017. She studied political science at Otterbein College and the University of Louisville. She returned to Mansfield in 2005 and is excited to be a part of the positive changes occuring in our community.
by Mary Kennard | Feb 12, 2020
“Self-love is about being more committed to your happiness than to your suffering in every single moment.”- Nitika Chopra
We all know that love is the main topic of discussion in February. Everywhere we turn we see hearts, candy, and cards reminding us to honor our loved ones with a token of appreciation, which is a lovely sentiment. While you’re contemplating the perfect way to tell someone else how much you care, don’t forget to tune into your own heart. Here are a few ways you can carve out moments of love for yourself:
Wake with a grateful heart.
Before your feet even touch the floor, take a moment to acknowledge what you are grateful for such as your health, your bed, etc.
Start your morning with an affirmation.
When sipping your coffee or washing your face try saying to yourself something like, “I am loved,” or ” Today I am capable of so much.”
Nourish your mind + body.
At lunchtime, fill up your water bottle and put on your favorite calming playlist or podcast. Take this moment to recharge and center yourself.
Looking for more opportunities to practice self-love?
Check out our podcast, Second Sip, which is a continuation of our wise-women conversations at MBA.
You may also enjoy our Girls Night In events. 
Mary Kennard is the Creative Director at Mind Body Align. Mary is a native Richland County resident and currently lives in Mansfield with her husband, Blake, and their two sons, Griffin and Phoenix. Mary loves coffee, reading about crystals, and discovering new music. You can follow her family adventures on Instagram at @MaryCabKennard or get fashion + makeup tips from her by following @OhioStyleVibe
by Mary Kennard | Feb 7, 2020
According to Dr. Gary Chapman, we all have a “love tank” inside of us. When the love tank is full, we feel connected, supported, and secure. When the love tank is empty, we feel disconnected, alone, and insecure. But how do you fill someone else’s love tank? You learn what their love language is and you use it to communicate how much they mean to you. It’s equally important that you understand your own love language. This way, you will know how to communicate to your loved ones what it is that you need to feel appreciated and secure.
But what if their language is different from yours? Or perhaps you don’t exactly know what to do with the information? These concerns can create unnecessary stress when it comes time to acknowledge them with a gift or expression of love. No one needs MORE stress in their life. That’s why we’ve used the 5 Love Languages to curate a gift guide that is intentional and reflects each of the languages uniquely.
Words of Affirmation
People with this as their top love language need words to help them feel loved. Choose gifts that make statements and show that you recognize an important aspect of them.
Gift Ideas:
ThoughtFull Pop-Open Cards- Each of these themed boxes come with 30 unique quotes. Stash them throughout their belongings to create a fun and unexpected surprise. Popping open the card is super satisfying and their small size makes them perfect to carry in your pocket or bag.
Write Now Journals- These journals have beautiful and inspirational quotes on the cover and throughout the pages. A lover of words will surely appreciate the ability to keep their own words close by while being inspired by iconic quotes and poems.
Physical Touch
The Touch love language is about the physical sensation that comes from a meaningful connection. Pick textural gifts that evoke a strong touch memory of you.
Gift Ideas:
Shawls/ Wraps/Blankets/Pillows- The key here is to find items that have a distinct texture and relate to something they already love. If they love to read in their favorite chair, perhaps a cozy shawl or wrap would be nice. If they love to Netflix and relax – a breathable blanket with some weight can help them unwind, if they’ve recently experienced a significant transition in their life, a weighted heart pillow can provide comfort in times of need.
Sacred Heart Stones – These little trinkets are perfect for a pocket and can easily be retrieved and rubbed with their thumb when they miss you or need to feel comforted.
Quality Time
QT people need you to make time for them. Gift them items that come with a follow-up event or date.
Gift Ideas:
Yoga/meditation supplies + classes: a new yoga mat or bag, perhaps an eye pillow. Commit to attending a class with them by purchasing a class pass in advance.
Books + discussion- Books are great for self-care but you can show your loved ones that you care by reading the same book and making time for discussion. Think about books that reflect their interests or will strengthen your relationship: The Mindful Couple, Awakened Relating, or The Untethered Soul.
Acts of Service
Acts of Service speakers feel loved when you do something nice for them that makes their life easier or better. Think about gifts that will enhance their goals or free up their schedule so that they can pursue the things they really enjoy.
Gift ideas:
Wellness Kits: Has your loved one been sick? Are they hoping to get healthy in the new year? Gift them a hand-curated wellness kit, complete with bath bombs, handmade soaps, reusable water bottles, wellness patches, etc.
Prompted Journaling- Journaling is incredibly rewarding but busy people may find it to be a chore. Help them reap the benefits of journaling by gifting them a prompted journal such as Calm the Chaos, I am here now, or 52 Weeks of Gratitude.
Receiving Gifts
This language may seem like the easiest one but in fact, can be the most stressful. Gifters are usually excellent at gifting meaningful items to their loved ones so you may feel pressure to make the same kind of effort. The key here is to take note of what brings them joy. Big or small, a meaningful gift will go a long way with this love language.
Gift Ideas:
Unique Finds: trendsetters love a unique find. Think jewelry with a story such as a Mala prayer necklace or a stone bracelet charged in a Sedona energy vortex.
Conscious Living- Think about items that do good in the world: reusable paper towels, glass water bottles, or fair-trade items such as bags and rugs.
Holistic and Mindful Living: gift items that will help them with their practice such as a singing bowl, meditation chime, or a crystal grid.
Take the FREE Love Language Quiz here.
All of the above-mentioned gift ideas can be found at the Butterfly House retail shop. Visit us on Tu-Friday from 10 am – 5 pm or email mary@mindbodyalign.com to have a custom gift package put together for you.
Upcoming Event
Girls Night In:
The Power of Self-Compassion
February 28th
Mary Kennard is the Creative Director at Mind Body Align. Mary is a native Richland County resident and currently lives in Mansfield with her husband, Blake, and their two sons, Griffin and Phoenix. Mary loves coffee, reading about crystals, and discovering new music. You can follow her family adventures on Instagram at @MaryCabKennard or get fashion + makeup tips from her by following @OhioStyleVibe
